The Bicultural Experience
Where do we belong?
I am a bilingual 1.5 Gen South Asian woman. I, like a lot of you bi-cultural folx, am neither Indian nor American. I don’t belong to one group. I’ve been rejected by Indians for being too American in my accent, personality, preferences, lifestyle etc. I’ve been rejected by American’s as too Indian in the other aspects of my personality, preferences, and lifestyle etc.
Not having a larger group to anchor ourselves to can make us feel lonely and untethered. We all have a need for belongingness. But where do we belong if both part’s of our identities reject us as not being like them enough?
What if, instead of belonging to any individual identify, we anchor ourselves to a larger group - the Bi-cultural group? What if we embraced belonging to a group of blended culture. A culture where we get to just be ourselves and that’s enough. A culture where we can see ourselves in a multitude of identities and they all converge into one - the Bi-cultural one.
What would it be like to embody acceptance that while we may not be one thing, we can be many things. We can be the person with an American accent who really loves the songs of our parent’s homeland. We can be the person who sometimes participates in the cultural aspects because it’s become tradition for us rather than what it means to our parents.
What would you need to know, hear, or feel to embody belongingness in our bi-culutural identity, to anchor ourselves to other bi-cultural people who also don’t quite fitting into any one category?
Embracing our intersectional identities is an ever-evolving life-long journey. I know it can be a struggle to find a place to fit in and be true to you. I’ve heard a lot of judgements from people over the years - you’re too American or too Indian, too rebellious or too obedient, too light or too dark, too fat or too thin. People can have a lot of expectations and opinions about you.
I’ve healed through the guilt, shame, and people-pleasing tendencies and learned to advocate for myself and become comfortable in my own skin. I feel empowered to lead my happiest authentic life and work through moment’s when it’s hard to embody the happiness and authenticity.
If you are struggling with your identity and feeling guilt, shame or want to break your people-pleasing habits to be more authentically you, then come talk about it in therapy with me. Let’s work together to process, heal, and embody your authentic self.
I believe if you are given a space free from judgment and expectations, and the opportunity to have your story witnessed by empathy and compassion, you will be able to experience the joy of being your authentic self. I want to get to know YOU, all of you, and empower you to live the life you want. When you are ready for change, reach out and connect with me for a FREE 15 minute consultation.
